Funny Job

Well the time of speech contests is upon us-actually one of the few times that a ALT properly used and actually are a valuable source. The winning kids are the ones that are used to speaking English and have a lot of help from their friendly plate-eyed sensei. Its a shame that most of them have absolutely no idea what they're saying and just learn it with all the verve and energy of a (dead) parrot but, hey, fair play to them for having a go! I was actually quite emotional last week as 8 of my students competed and, in true japanese overreaction were ridiculously nervous/scared/excited/nutty. 3 out of my 8 got in the top 4 which I was well chuffed about (and means that I get another "day off" to go to the next round in Yamaguchi-woo!)
Yesterday I had the mis/fortune to judge at the Iwakuni round. Megan and I were joined by 2 high school English teachers. Upon meeting the ojisan I remember thinking he had a good head of hair for an old man-as the day wore on I kicked myself for such stupidy as he clearly was wearing a wig (read dead badger on his head) The other teacher belonged to the breed of Japanese English speakers who think that iftheytalkreallyfast they'll sound fluent. Theyjustsoundweirdne?
Highlights of the day included a girl singing the chorus of Dancing Queen in her speech, the geekiest student ever in trousers finishing somewhere around his knees (Damn these flood pants!)and a speech that will go down in history, Funny Job:
"The women was about to shout "get out of my house" but her husband put something in her mouth. It was very delicious and she forgot her anger."
Me and Megan did a bloody good job of stifling our giggles in the guise of choking at this point. It was so funny we gave her good marks even though she was pretty piss poor.
(oh and if you were wondering, the thing he put in her mouth was lemon pie)